Healthy with Shani

...i just polished off an ungodly amount of sushi and sashimi from a meeting this afternoon.  I also had four cookies - two peanut butter and two m&ms. My stomach feels preggers and I cannot wait to go home and curl up on my couch with my fur babies and just snooze.  It's dreary and cold outside anyway and today was an off day from the gym - even OFF from cardio. Talk about rest and recovery.....I need to recover from this afternoon's feast.  It happens....I can eat more than a man!  I just can.  And sometimes, yes, I do!! Keyword - sometimes !

when you're recovering from an addiction, the possibility of relapse always remains below the surface.  the longer it's been since you've partaken in your addictive tendency, the deeper that addiction will be buried below the surface.  but it is still there. ive been working hard on my fitness lately and feeling amazing.  i feel triumphant and positive about the changes i am making to my body.  Sometimes I eat more than I would like and sometimes I make poor food choices.  Sometimes I miss two days in a row working out.  Sometimes I go out and have a drink....or two or three. But most of the time, my habits are in alignment with my goals of achieving the level of fitness I desire.   Yesterday I had another successful day of goal oriented eating.  My workout was strong and intense and I felt great and was looking forward to heading home and having a healthy meal, taking a hot bath and getting plenty of restful sleep. I went home and ...

The thing about putting yourself out there for all to see means that all may see what you put out there. I am someone who believes in second chances - most of the time.  Sometimes I am scatterbrained when it comes to relationships.  But I do know that if someone truly wants to be in my life in a capacity that works, for my life, then I will allow them to be. I am ultra sensitive at times and hurt easily until I decide to close off - and then I can be like stone.  I will move on as if you never existed.  I do not intend to close my heart.   I just do . But that's only after I've gone to the ends of the earth for you and the relationship.  I will overlook things or tolerate certain things while sitting back quietly.  I will speak loudly when something is wrong and yes my timing could be better and yes my communication could be better.  I know where my weaknesses lie and it is something that I aim to improve. If you don't listen, I will need ...

I will safely state that I have finally reached that "speed forward ahead" point with my training. It's the point where you don't crave the foods or consume the excess that drifts you from your goals. It's the point where you can actually see changes when you look in the mirror. It's the point where not only are your pants looser, but so are your shirts. It's the point where you step inside the gym even when you don't feel like it because you know you won't allow yourself to walk out.  And you know that by being there you wouldn't dare waste that time on a half-assed session. It's the point where you do feel like it. This has been a feeling that I haven't unlocked since I was close to stepping on stage the first time, back in 2010.  That was the first time in my life that I had committed to results driven training versus just wading through the cardio equipment in the gym and eating Taco Bell for dinner. To get myself here...

Remember those seven thousand squats I boasted about completing the other day? Well today it feels like there's a little tiger living in my quads and he's purring, happy and kneading the shit out of what's left of my muscle tissue. YEAH it hurts a bit.  My ass hurts, too. But I love this pain.  It symbolizes progression....kind of like a built in reminder that you are capable of pushing yourself harder than you pushed last time. I find it amusing when I hear women in the gym whimpering their way through a workout.  If I can hear your whines through my super sound proof Marley Revolutions then you need to please exit the gym.  Go eat a protein bar, shoot a Red Bull and return when you have the energy to power through a worthwhile session.  If you can't do that then you should exit and try again tomorrow. But, admirably, if you still insist on completing your session then please refrain from having to make a scene that ensures the rest of the gym knows y...

I am no longer going to blog about my eye condition....well, maybe I'll update when I have my surgeries etc. But my doc gave me news today that has me holding my breath waiting for November 30th.  I will no longer give attention to this thing that exists in me that keeps me immersed in the continual stream of "what ifs." I have to stop identifying with this as being part of me.  So I will start by not blogging about it anymore.  That vault is CLOSED. On a better note, I've had a few days of goal oriented eating under the belt of my shrinking waistline eehehe yaay.  Really, I lose weight SO fast and I never used to be this way.  I credit that to hitting the weights hard and consistently. I tend to melt with little effort. There is a new chapter that has begun in my life.  Sometimes you just know when one ends and a new one begins.  It seems that everything around you changes....looks different.  Smells different. The temperature has drop...

Squats!! Lots and lots and lots... Around 6pm, I traded my PJs for gym clothes...slippers for sneakers. I needed to work legs today but I didn't even want to head to the gym. I didn't wanna go out in the cold and i did not want to get on the train. But I put my hat down low and headed out. On the train, those pangs haunted me. I thought "what could I do to erase this feeling? What kind of workout could elevate me above this?" This is what I came up with: 250 Squats: Perform each exercise back to back with moderate weight; rest 30 seconds between each circuit and repeat - 5 times (I did this circuit on the Max Rack - it's easier on my knees) 10 front squats w/bar 10 regular bar squats 10 squats holding 25lb plate in front of chest 10 squats holding edge of rack, feet close 10 jumping squats Rest 30 seconds...repeat I then did: 4 sets Deadlifts 4 sets hip abduction machine 4 sets lying leg curl 100 reps on leg press - with no weight ...

I did a 40 hour fast recently. It's easy for me not to eat when I'm feeling down. I've never really been an emotional eater - unless the emotion is happy. I did the fast to determine my food allergies...and I think my inflammatory culprit is eggs. I've been wandering around in a fog for the past week...literally and figuratively. And my heart feels really broken over the end of a relationship recently. We went through a lot in a short period but we became extremely close. And yes, I did fall but I couldn't bring myself to tell him. I wanted to be sure. Maybe I was blinded by emotion. But we were broken toward the end so I freaked out, jumped ship and said goodbye. Despite all I thought we had, he let me walk away so easily. He instantly became a cordial stranger. Of course I expected him to chase me. After all we had....my ego expected him to chase me. But he didn't. And it reaffirmed my choice. And that makes me sad...as if I were the o...